Jan 11, 2014

An Old Friend

Lillian the Domestic Engineer
I wanted to dedicate a little blurb on my blog today to an old friend. An old friend of mine in the literal sense of the word.
    I work outside my home on a part time basis providing Outreach Home Support for local Seniors in their homes. 
    I love my job. I set my own hours and am able to select both the number of days and the number of Clients that I take on each week. I don't drive any farther than 15 minutes from my own home to work and I immensely enjoy the people that I work with. 
    I look forward to seeing, visiting and assisting each of my clients on either a bi weekly or on a monthly basis. I help them with their requests for assistance with everything from laundry to lunch. 
   I love to see their faces light up as I enter their homes; my presence sometimes, 
simply filling the void in the loneliness of living alone. Rather than wash down the fridge or move a chair to the other room, I am silently requested to listen up as they speak of how they are doing.
    It is somewhere in the course of time, between the words spoken and the memories shared that I come to realize just how much I do care. My work is much, much more than just a few clients to me.
   I lost a client and a friend yesterday..
   I learned a lot about him in the 6 months I was lucky enough to know him. I learned that he had had family living in the area for many generations. He often spoke of his Sisters and of his younger Brother who lived just down the hall. I learned he had been pre deceased by his Dad and recently, his only Son.  I know how proud he was of his Son, the Dancer who went on to win at the "Worlds" several years in a row. I know how quietly and graciously he mourned his loss. I know he was very excited about making a trip to this years Worlds Dance Competition, in the company of several of his Sons former dance students,  to lend his support, in spite of the pain resulting in the recent absence of his Son.
    I learned that he taught short courses for many years at a local College and that he could shoe a horse with the best of the best. I learned that he had quick wit and a great sense of humor. I know he was particular and to the point.
    I learned that many years ago he had had surgery done to remove the cataracts on his eyes. Sadly I also learned that one eye had been damaged in the process, leaving him blind in his right eye. He spoke of his Diabetes and the resulting loss of his left leg at the knee as well as the stroke he suffered, that would temporarily rob him of his ability to speak.
    I know he struggled long and hard in his recovery although never fully recovering his speech or the use of his right arm. I remember him saying that not being able to clip his nails was the worst part of his immobility. I helped him put a new boot onto his prosthesis that day; his inability to pull it on and then to lace and tie it up, kept him from acting for self.   
   The last time we spoke, we were standing at his kitchen sink, where I had just finished washing and wiping up when he asked me
  "Why do you do this?"
   "Do what?" I asked him.
 "Why do women set the drain plug crookedly in the sink hole?" he continued.
 "My last home care lady, my x wife and now you do the same" he lamented as he reached down to set the askew plug straightly and down into the sink hole. 
 "It does no good sitting in there like that" he informed me.
 "I'll be more aware of that" I promised him as I reached out to say goodbye.
 Touching his arm, we shared a laugh before continuing as I usually did. 
  "Take care yourself Brian and I'll see you in a couple of weeks" I'd tell him
  knowing each time that he would say,
 "Why" 
  I replied to him time after time "Because I enjoy seeing you" 
 I'd see him smile just before closing the door.

In memory of my friend Brian.

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